Blue
Shield of
Dealing
with today’s Teen Issues
Imagine
growing up in the second millennium: Your best friend just got a nose ring,
tattoos abound in gym class, and classmates talk about everything from hair
styles to homosexuality in Internet chat rooms. Add raging hormones, a need to
rebel, and peer pressure, and teens have the potential for making mistakes that
could affect the rest of their lives.
The
world has changed so quickly that parents often don't recognize the pitfalls
awaiting their teens. You may be shocked and confused by your teen's completely
unfamiliar world. Help your teen to make good choices by understanding the
daily pressures he or she must deal with. Don't isolate yourself from his or
her reality out of fear or feeling uncomfortable.
Be aware and informed about your teen's
activities.
- Stay involved—know your kid's friends and their parents,
what they do in their spare time, and where they are. This doesn't mean
you should grill or nag your teen; rather, you should show interest and
demonstrate that you care about his or her general welfare.
- Remember to listen, listen, listen.
The best way to find out the issues your teen faces is to keep discussion
open and listen to what he or she talks about. Avoid the 2 Ps—patronizing
and preaching—when talking to your teen.
- Support his or her interests. Ask questions about which subjects and
activities excite him or her and try to expand on them. For example, if
your daughter loves to draw, consider visiting a museum to expose her to
other art forms.
- Don't panic. Just because your teen expresses a desire
for something you disagree with, don't jump to conclusions. For example,
if your teenage daughter wants to get a tattoo or a navel ring, it does
not mean she is on drugs and on a downward spiral. If she gets good
grades, has good friends, and responsibly juggles a full schedule, she is
likely just trying to express her individuality—separating herself from
her parents by trying to identify with her peers—and a navel ring is one
way of doing that. Regardless of the solution, as her parents you need to
attentively listen and try to understand your daughter's viewpoint. Be
willing to say: "The problem is ours. These things worry us. Can you
help us deal with this?"
- Seek compromises. While parents need to set clear boundaries
about what is acceptable to them, teenagers often rebel against parental
dictates and absolutes. A navel ring may be one way your teenager tests
her limits. As a compromise, you might offer more acceptable ear piercing
or temporary tattoos.
- Set clear limits about the Internet. The Internet can create its own set of
problems, many of them serious. A majority of teenagers now have Internet
access—which virtually brings the world into your home,
including pornography, hate propaganda, and intense advertising. Chat
rooms can be especially dangerous because they are anonymous and teens may
not realize they are communicating with a predatory adult, and because it
is difficult for parents to monitor them. Limit the amount of time you
allow your child to be online, use filters or other parental control
features, and monitor your teen's online activity. Teens need to
understand that talking to people in chat rooms is the same as talking to
strangers, so they should never give out any personal identifying information and never agree to meet someone they have
met online.
This is an example of a topic that you will
find by visiting the
Blue Shield of California website,
Simply log in and under “search” type “Teen Issues or
Teen Health”.
This will give you access to many issues related to
today’s teens.
(The above information was obtained by
Blue Shield of